Baring My Soul

Ok, I'm not really baring my soul, but I am very nervous about this post.

So here are the stats:

Weigh In (WI) 4/22/11: 201.2 lbs
WI 4/29/11: 199.5 lbs
Change: -1.7 lbs

And before those of you who know me and see me often say it, no, I don't look like I weight that much, but yes, I do weigh that much.  No, I don't know where I hide it, but I would like to have to "hide" much less pounds.  I figure I keep it on my hips.

Anyway, I said Wednesday I would start dissecting why I struggle so much with this.  So, here goes nothing.

First, what I've noticed is that I am a bored and nervous eater.  I have tried to fix this, but when I am unsuccessful, I try and make sure that there is always some of my favorite fruit or veggies around to gnaw on instead of the sweets that I prefer.  Which is where the fruits come in, natural sugars, yummmm...  I am so glad that watermelon is coming back into season, I love it so much.  It's sweet and if you get a good watermelon, it melts in your mouth.  But, that aside, I am really working on picking healthy options when I snack.

Second, I have a ginormous sweet tooth.  And I bake a lot.  Which, is not compatible with weight loss.  I try to make the sweet things I eat healthier.  I get the Weight Watchers Bakery Treats and Frozen Treats to help, and I also try and bake healthy treats too.  My sweet tooth is a huge obstacle.  Side note: White Chocolate should be illegal, it's far too delicious for my own good.

I've also noticed that if I have something that I really, really like, I am more prone to eat more of it.  I think this goes back to when I was a kid and there was something that was a special treat in the house.  I was competing with two brothers and I had to eat my share now, or I might not get any later and I find myself still in that mindset, probably in part because I married the bottomless pit.  I don't know how to break it, but I have a mantra that I repeat when I am aware of that reaction creeping into my mind.  I CONTROL WHAT GETS PURCHASED.  IF THIS IS GONE TOMORROW, I CAN GO BUY MORE.  BE PATIENT.  I need to have that overrule the ingrained instinct to eat more now, because it is here.  That gets me in trouble.

I also said that I would update on my exercise this week for you today.

Wednesday

I went for a walk with Adam.  We walked at a quick pace for a half hour, as per a Get Fit by Memorial Day (I am under no illusions this will get me fit by Memorial Day, as they expected you to start three months before Memorial Day) workout routine that Cracked Actor posted on her blog. (I hope you choose to switch to Blogger, loves, it's much more universal!)

Thursday

I went for a walk again, and I was supposed to do a quick full body circuit, but after my walk to Walgreen's, my ears hurt from the wind and cold and then I had to pack to go visit my parents and in-laws and drive to my parents.... so I basically just ran out of time.  And I'm really good at making excuses.

Friday

Today though, I did more than the work out plan said to.  I did 30 minutes on the bike and then the quick body circuit.  Adam and I also took TJ, my parents' dog, for a long walk.  It did nothing for her neurosis, she still is whacko, but I got some more exercise and soaked up some recently rare Michigan sun.

Now, I don't know when or how I hurt my neck, but I think I slept on it funny last night and then screwed it up more during my workout.  Fortunately tomorrow is a day off, as is Sunday before I start week two.  Hopefully those rest days will allow my body to recover from me.  I can deal with overall muscle soreness, but the neck pain really sucks.  Heating pad seems to help, but only for a little bit.

I hope that I have a successful week this week too.  I know I won't fit into that dress by Saturday (OMG, GRADUATION IS IN A WEEK!?) but I can still have a successful week and drop a couple more pounds and hopefully be out of my 190s rut soon.

Goals for this week:
1. Drink 16oz of water before every meal.
2. Remember to take my damn multi-vitamin.
3. Workout every day.
4. Take a yoga class.
5. Pack up half the apartment.
6. Enjoy my last week as an undergraduate student. (Includes going to Max and Emily's on Thursday for Loaded Baked Potato Soup!)

It's the end of the semester, so what do I do? Procrastinate!

Yes, I procrastinate.  But I have several days until these papers are due, and I have one of them halfway finished.

So anyway, as I sit here days away from graduation, Gentle Thursday and Friday tomorrow and the next day, (which I swear, I will use to finish my paper Mom, I promise), I am throwing myself a pity party.  I went shopping at JC Penney's today because they are having a huge sale and I want to get a new dress for graduation.  I found a gorgeous white sundress that I want to wear to graduation, but it's on clearance, and surprise, surprise, my fat ass doesn't fit, or rather, my stomach, doesn't allow the zipper to close.  Also, my inability to contort myself like an acrobat to be able to reach the zipper, the dress doesn't fit. And I am sad because it is freaking cute, I love it and it's a size too small and JCP doesn't have any in a larger size.

Because of this, I resolute (again, I think, but I'm too lazy to look) to blog about my weight loss journey every Friday.  Updates on my work outs that week, whether I managed to stay on plan that week, my weigh ins, etc.  I cringe when I think about putting this out there on the internets, but I feel I need to be accountable in some other ways than I am already, because I obviously am not being accountable enough.

I will write more about what I think are my issues with food on Friday, and obviously about my week.  As for now, I need to go procrastinate by watching the last 1:44 of the third period of game seven of the Penguins vs Lightening.

Penguins need to lose.

Important Announcement involving shoeperwoman.com

I read a blogger named Katri from The Cat With Glasses who follows a woman named Amber who styles herself the Shoeperwoman.  She has been actively blogging as Shoeperwoman for a little over two years and has had the domain since 2008.

Now Amber, has run into a problem with another woman named Laura who has knowingly registered Shoeperwoman with .co.uk and has now been trying essentially un-do all the work that Amber and her husband have been working for.  I really hope that this never happens to me, but I also don't anticipate this blog actually being more than an outlet for me.  You know never know, though, so please go give Shoeper Woman some love and read the full scope of the problem.